Are you lonely? Are you living your life without meaningful friendships? Do you feel like no one sees you, that you’re invisible to people around you. Do you feel like no one really cares? Do you find yourself getting a ‘fix’ of friendships from social media, only too soon to realise that you are once again alone… and lonely.
Well, I have good news. You are not alone in your loneliness. There are many, many people who are suffering in silence, feeling ashamed and embarrassed to admit they are lonely.
You are not alone.
I hope that through these words, you will take courage to move out of loneliness, and into connections with other people, just like you, longing for love.
We were never intended to live life alone, or in loneliness. We have been intricately designed to long for close, honest, and caring friendships. Feeling lonely is a sign that there is something wrong. Your emotions, body and mind are all speaking in one accord - this is not right… but what can I do? Being lonely is so familiar, it seems almost impossible to feel differently. How can I crawl out of loneliness? How can I feel hope, when I feel hopeless, joy when I feel deep sadness. Can I really have close, caring friends?
Yes, you can have friends! Real friends, in the flesh, who care, love and enjoy your presence. You are a highly valuable, unique, and gifted person who other people need to know and have as a friend. There are people who need you as their friend. You are essential and important.
Take courage, and take steps to move forward into connecting with other people to love, laugh, and be a friend.
5 Steps… one step at a time
1/ It’s healthy to admit you are lonely. Being honest with yourself with feeling lonely, sad, fearful, despair, hopelessness or worthlessness, is an important step. Pay attention to where you feel these painful emotions in your body. Name the emotions. Accept them. Be compassionate towards yourself.
2/ There may be significant reasons as to why you feel lonely. Reach out for help. Call Lifeline 1300 855 556 or Beyond Blue 1300 224 636. Call someone you know… make that call.
3/ Who would you like to be a friend to? What type of people would you like to be around?
4/ Do something. Make a decision to participate in something, somewhere, where there are people you would likely enjoy being around.
5/ Keep going. Stick at it. Even when it feels hard, keep going. Keep meeting new people, keep going to different places, keep focused on building friendships with people. This takes time, so give time to allow friendships to develop.
Even in your loneliness, you can experience the most closest friendship that is perfect, full of love, comfort, compassion, and understanding. This type of relationship can only be experienced personally. This relationship is between the one who created you, your God, who is your Father. God speaks of himself as being love. God is love. 1 John 4:8.
Your Father God longs for you to know Him, to know His Son, Jesus Christ, who died for you, for the things you have said and done that was not of God. Your Father God yearns for you to know complete joy, peace, and an overwhelming love from Him to you. He wants to have long conversations with you, to hear everything that is happening in your life, your struggles with loneliness, your hopes, your dreams. He wants you to know Him, and know that you are deeply and dearly loved by Him. A love that is so vast, and fulfilling.
The emptiness, aching heart, loneliness, longing for love, is the space where God your Father fills up. His love is big enough to carry your burdens, He is with you, always, to comfort, calm, and console.
We would love to connect with you, to help you begin your journey of reaching out, making friends, real friends who care, love, support, and love to laugh and have fun. We would love to help you connect with your Father God, to receive His love, to know Jesus, and be filled with His perfect love.
Reach out right now, fill your details here, and we will speak with you, and connect with you, and begin the journey with you, out of loneliness… into meaningful, fun, caring friendships.
Written by Emma Wilkinson
Pastoral Care Paster